Last night I was driving back from Fresno (Target training) and a song came on and I realized, "This adventure, it was never about me, it was You" was true. That my life is is not about me, it's about God. And I didn't understand it. I couldn't figure out why or how. I turned off the music and drove the next hour in silence, talking with God. Asking, "So if you're there now... explain this to me. Beyond the cliche 'God made everything so it's about him.' Beyond the standard Christian answers."
And it took a while, but eventually He brought to mind the verse, "You are not your own, you were bought with a price." (I just had to look it up exactly to find it was 1 Cor 6.) But I realized it was true. If Christ bought me with his blood, if he ransomed my life from eternal damnation, then "technically" he owns my life here on earth too. But I've got some sort of lease/rent on my body here on earth where I can choose whether or not to follow him and his words. Where I can choose to live out this salvation (yay for Duzik's Romans) or not.
The best analogy I could come up with was like how a lot of truck drivers don't own the trucks they drive, and they certainly don't own the products in their truck that they are transporting. They get directions from their dispatch where to take the product and when to get it there. They choose whether or not to follow these directions and their orders, cause they're still driving the truck themselves.
In the same way, we're still living in our own bodies and choose whether or not to follow God's directions. A lot of the time though, I think we fail at this. Could you imagine what the trucking industry would look like if more often then not the drivers didn't follow their directions? Maybe that's what's going on with our world and why everything is so messed up here on earth? Because no one follows God's directions? *shrugs*
I'm still trying to understand this. And this is a new feeling for me (lately). Because I haven't felt like God has been speaking much to me lately. It could change my life... this realization that my life's adventure is not about me but it's about God. Now I'm present with choices. Do I want to follow this new thread of thought down the rabbit hole and see where it takes me? If I do follow thought thread, do I choose to act on the conclusions and reality that comes from it? And every day, ever hour, every minute... I have to choose to continue to follow these directions, this new way of life that the adventure is not about me, it's about God.
I'm mean, sure, I've said before, "I'll live my life for you God. I'll do anything for you." And I meant it. I think I still do. But even focusing my life on God, it has always been MY life. What should my life look like if I lived life as an adventure about God? I don't know. I hope I find out.
Eyes To See
5 days ago